public service announcement

Boys and thesis papers do not go well together. Just in case anyone was wondering.

concentration lacking

My ability to concentrate during the day is something of a joke. No matter how long I sit here, I get out bits and pieces of what I need to be doing, but my mind is always and forever someplace else. I don't know if the better course of action is going to be to just sit here and wait it out, or to go do something else in the meantime until my attention span is longer than that of a gnat. I suppose I need to just stay where I am. Even if I'm only getting little snips done now, its better than if I were to go somewhere and just do nothing all day. I can't just wait till it gets dark outside every time I have something I need to do.

Its demoralizing not to live up to your own expectations. I've been told that I set mine too high and that I need to be more understanding of myself. I'm working on it...slowly. I definitely don't want to be one of those people who just doesn't get anything done with their life because they didn't push themselves at all to be a better person. I couldn't handle that. I just need to try to find some focus. Maybe I should start taking all that yoga stuff seriously....

still alive...ish

You know, even if I had had time to write, I'm not sure what I would have said. The past month has been busy and emotional and crazy--and every time I have a minute to myself I feel like there are a thousand things that I should be doing instead of writing. Like working on my thesis, or trying to find a job--you know, something like that. I finally have a moment sitting here in my history class when i should be paying attention to my teacher, but even now I know that I can't really focus on thinking of something provocative to say because I have to study for a vocab and grammar quiz for my next class, and after that I really should go to the library and spend a couple of hours working on things for my thesis or studying for an exam I have next week. "So much to do and so little time" seems to be the mantra by which I am currently living my life.

All in all, these things are such that no one should really want to hear about them, but they are all I can think about. Not interesting for anyone, especially me. I will have to think about what I want to say carefully, and post something in a fit of procrastination some time later this week.